"One of the sobering truths of military history is that an army tends to approach each war with the weapons and tactics of the last one. It's a tough start that can turn to disaster if the army doesn't learn to adapt quickly..There's a war going on for the souls of men, and for the souls of young men in particular...But you're in the thick of that fight right now, and you need all the help you can get. That's the reason for this book."
Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality by Hal and Melanie Young, pages 1 & 2
The Introduction clearly lays out that this book published by Great Waters Press and https://www.raisingrealmen.com is a battle plan, a mission statement, a book of tactical vantage points written from a man who has been in the battle for years and trained his young soldieries (6 boys and 2 girls) throughly equipped for the battle of purity in a culture that is increasingly sexual and instantly accessible. Being able to review this book has blessed our family in more ways then I think we will evidence in the few short weeks we've been able to read this and apply it to our family life. My husband and I both read this book in preparation for raising our currently two young boys. The surprise was we ended up being blessed and edified by it's content to our own struggles!
Love, Honor, and Virtue is written with the audience of a young man. The language and content are targeted for a young man aged 12-15, but really can benefit a man (or even female) at any age. This book, from what I've gathered, is a tool that you can hand to your boy to read and then discuss it's content with him after you have throughly read it yourself and understand it's content.
The book begins with laying a foundation of what God's Word says about sex and marriage and how He created it and designed the differences between genders. A foreign idea (at least in our current teaching methods it is foreign) of Marriage Education, not Sex Education is established as the authors take the reader on a journey beginning at the tiny building blocks of DNA describing the impossibility of being a "girl trapped in a boys body" as well as what exactly makes a male and female distinctly different and important. Proceeding from there puberty is explained in great detail for both boys and girls transitioning into the discussion of marriage and giving a general, yet descriptive explanation of how the physical act of sex works. Sex is also attributed the connotations of being fun, passionate, and enjoyable all within the confines of marriage!
That's not where it ends! Conception, pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, postpartum and raising a baby are all covered in the beginnings of this book. This is what is meant by "Marriage Education" not strictly "Sex Education". With this understanding as a whole, the young man reading this book can then be introduced to how Satan has preverted God's design and how he can stand on purity!
Porogrpahy is addressed and it's affects on the individual consuming it, the wife, a man's children, and society as a whole is an eye-opening and sobering few pages! If these facts don't burn a desire for chastity within someone, then the Five Point Defense plan will do the trick. How does a man stay pure in his ways? (1) Leave of change the situation, (2) Pray, (3) Read the Scripture, (4) Sing to the Lord, (5) Go to your authorities. Each point is elaborated on and practical applications are described.
Biblical light as well as scientific findings are shed on the act of masterbation. It is concluded as self-absuive and has some detrimental affects on a person's marriage and health as a whole.
So how does a man stay pure? How does he not only battle the sexual temptations out there, but how does he advance in a relationship with a female while maintaining purity? Don't worry, the last half of this book lays a Biblical framework as well as the author's opinions and applications of this framework for courtship!
Not being unblbically yoked is clearly laid out in the Bible, but how to move from just "friends" to honestly thinking about and considering the possibility of marriage is not specifically addressed in the Bible. As the authors describe it, "The process of finding a mate is largely a matter of Christian liberty... There is no definite pattern in Scripture for how we find our mates - which means we give each other grace about the patterns we choose. " (page 79).
A point I greatly appreciate, one that would have changed my husband and I's marriage greatly, was that a man should prepare for a family before he brings a young woman into a marriage with him. How will he provide? Where will they live? What does he have to offer her? How will she be better off with him then with her Father?
A young person is to honor their parents through the process of finding a spouse and timing is an important thing to consider and is touched on in the pages of this book. How a young man can protect his soon-to-be-wife in compromising situations is illustrated as well giving him specific things he can say and do or set up to protect him and his girlfriend from losing the purity of their relationship.
A young man is thourhgouly equipped with an understanding of marriage, sex, gender, puberty, porography, and courtship all through God's Word and godly men's wisdom and application just from this 95-page book titled Love, Honor and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attude Toward Sexuality by Hal and Melanie Young.
This book has changed me.
It's changed my husband.
It will greatly influence how we prepare our young boys for the world.
We are very grateful that this book was written and I pray my review reflects that!
My dad, who has an interest radio program called The Man Up Show, did an interview/review of this book and Hal and Melanie Young's book No Longer Little: Parenting Tweens With Grace and Hope with my husband and I. You can listen to that here: http://manupshow.org/book-reviews/
You can also read my review of No Longer Little: Parenting Tweens With Grace and Hope here.
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