I often times go through Proverbs 31, 1 Peter 3 and Titus 2 and just check my heart and my actions as a wife. Every single time I go through these passages I learn something new about being a Godly Wife and am challenged in some way.
There are two scenarios that I want to very broadly share with you about standing by your man. These are two things that I have walked through recently and just want to encourage other wives who are facing similar, or even harder situations.
1 Peter 3:1 & 2 says,
Wives, likewise, [be] submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct [accompanied] by fear.
We had a great opportunity in front of us. One that we had been praying for for a while. All that was required on our end was to be faithful in a few small areas. One of them being a financial plan.
Early in our marriage we determined that my husband was going to be the sole person to do the finances. I needed to not be involved at all because I was prone to taking it over (this was when we were freshly married).
So, going into this great opportunity, I was a bit nervous. I wanted to take control of things and make sure they were done correctly so we wouldn't mess this great opportunity up! But, I read 1 Peter 3 and decided to abide by this and see what happened...
I respectfully approached my husband about my concerns. ONCE. Then I sat back and prayed. I literately watched the
...but said nothing. When everything was brought to light by someone we love very much, my husband was devestated! How did this happen?!?
I was also devastated! Bummer! We missed out on such a blessing.
I could have easily said, "This is all your fault! I told you! I TOLD YOU!!!"
But, I decided to encourage, love, support, and stand by my man's side. "Next time love. You got it next time. Let's work on this together and I know you can do it next time. This is how you learn. I am proud of you and you can do this."
You may be thinking... But if you would have taken over, you probably would not have missed out, wouldn't have been devested and your husband wouldn't have been humiliated!! How can that be a blessing??
Ladies, we need to let God deal with our husbands and stand by their side no matter what happens. My husband saw a pattern in his character that God wanted to weed out and although I have seen it, and pointed it out to him before, he really needed to go through this whole situation for God to REALLY show him.
His love and honor for me has grown so much since this all had been working out.
He tells me how thankful he is that he has me as his wife.
He is encouraged and built up to come back stronger rather then shriveled back and defeated.
There was a situation that broke out amongst people close to us. My husband strongly felt like he needed to take action and try to make things right. I, on the other hand, wanted to simply pray, wait, and possibly talk to a single person rather then make the issue a large deal. But, my husband disagreed. SO I supported him. Fully. Even though the entire thing ended up not being a big deal after all.
He made some phone calls and stirred up some things that probably could have been avoided. One person I love very, very much was hurt by the whole thing. I tried to explain what my husband's intentions were (even though I didn't fully agree with them) and never said ANYTHING about how I felt about the whole thing. I honored my husband and stood by his side.
Again I could have easily said, "I told you!! You should have listened to me!!"
But because I simply let him do what he thought was right, he was much more open to seeking counsel after the whole thing and was much more open to correction in it.
"It's alright love. This is how we learn. I am just thankful I have a husband who is willing to do and say the uncomfortable things when he thinks that it is nessessary. I know you meant it all in love."
I love my husband so so much and everyday I am blow away at the man that God has blessed me with! He is a great leader, an amazing father, and a pretty-close-to-perfect-husband in my opinion ;) (obviously he isn't... but he is my hero)
And I am determined to be loyal to my husband and support him in all his endeavors because I trust that God is leading him. There are MANY MORE times that I don't agree, but go along with him and I end up being the wrong one! That happens more often then not.
Stand By Your Man.
Honor His Position as your HUSBAND, even if you can't honor him as a person.
Watch God bless you and change him :)