When you feel like a horrible mom...

My little Alecia Grace had surgery on her ear tag Friday afternoon. She couldn't eat the entire morning and yet was as joyful as ever! All the nurses and doctors were blown away at how well-

behaved she was even though she was really hungry.

When it came time for surgery, I had to bring her into the Operating Room and cross her little arms over her

chest and hold her tight. The nurse placed an anesthesia mask on her face and she kicked and screamed to get it off until she had fallen asleep. :( I FELT HORRIBLE!

I could only imagine the things going through her head... "Why did my mom restrain me?" "Why didn't she save me?" "Why did she allow that to happen?" "I thought she loved me?"

Once she woke up from her surgery, a nurse came and got me and walked me down the hall where I met up with another nurse holding my baby. She was doing that sniffling noise like she had been screaming really hard. She saw me and reached out to me and snuggled into my chest with a huge sigh of relief. From that point on, she was calm. She fell asleep in my arms as we waled to the recovery room. We laid on the bed and she still slept, silently, and safely in mama's arms. Thank you Jesus for that special time with my daughter!

We left to go to the UP (Upper Peninsula of Michigan) to visit my dad after her surgery. Our trip out there was such a blessing. Everyone kept commenting on how obedient and well-behaved our children were. "How do you get your kids to not grab the spoon and jar of food while you are feeding them?" "I just tell them no...?" "Well we did too, but our son still does it." "We were serious when we said no....? We tapped their hand with the spanking spatula and said NO!"

So all in all, I was blessed by all that happened. I know that being a mom means doing things you don't necessarily WANT to do, but what you know is best for your child: whether it's holding them for their anesthesia, or discipling them to point the away from sinful behavior and toward godliness. The feelings of being a "bad parent" quickly fade when you realize the blessing of being faithful to do what is right and best for your child. :)